


This is our safe place

by xxtozier



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Boys In Love, Coming Out, Eventual Smut, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Fools in Love, Friends to Lovers, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Sad Richie Tozier, Smoking, hammock cuddles, mentions of abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:40:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21976744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxtozier/pseuds/xxtozier
Summary: 5 times richie and eddie went to the clubhouse together and the one time richie went alone.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Kudos: 46





	This is our safe place

1  
fall of 89’

“Maybe we could add Christmas lights. Bright colourful ones and hang them from the roof and wrap them around the posts. You catch what i’m saying Eds?” 

Eddie looked up at him for the first time since they’d left his house. Richie could tell Eddie was thinking about something by the way his eyebrows furrowed and his mouth formed a straight line.

“Or not. We don’t need to, I just thought it might look cool. Do you wanna use lanterns instead? Or—“

“Christmas lights are wonderful Rich, I have some at home we can use,” he was quiet for another moment. “Why are you doing this?” 

Richie kicked a rock into the ditch as they crossed over the muddy water on the wooden planks that Mike had laid down. He waited until Eddie had crossed over safely before answering, even offering out his hand for him to grab but Eddie ignored it, clutching a branch instead. Cheeks flushed, Richie continued leading them deeper into the barrens. 

“I don’t know Eddie. Maybe I just thought that this would be a good way to move forward. After Pennywise-” Richie heard Eddie’s sharp inhale but ignored it. “After Pennywise, we stopped hanging out down here. The summer was fucked up Eddie, but we can’t let it hold us back forevor. Do you not think this is a good idea? If so you can leave right now but to me, anything that will help get the losers back together is a good idea. Even if that means cleaning out a fucking spider filled musty dusty hole that smells like your moms underwear.” 

Eddie giggled, and it was music to Richie’s ears. “Beep beep dickhead,” was all he said but it was enough to make Richie smile widely. They stopped walking once they reached the entrance and Richie found the latch, pulling the trapdoor open. 

“Ladies first, Spaghetti,” Richie held the door open with his left hand and ushered Eddie inside with his right. 

“Shut the fuck up Richard and don’t call me spaghetti,” he brushed past him and into the clubhouse. Richie felt goosebumps where their skin had touched. He ignored the feeling.

“Oh, you love it.” He propped the trapdoor open and started climbing in. “How does it look down there? Clean I hope.” 

Eddie snorted. “Ha I wish. Then we wouldn’t have to do any work and we could just relax. Actually, I can think of ten other ways we could’ve relaxed but noooo, we had to come down here and give the whole fucking—“

Richie cut him off. “Eddie, Eds, Spaghetti Head, this is gonna be worth it. So shut up and try to think about the finished product. Now, what did you bring.” 

Eddie pulled off his backpack and unzipped it, letting the contents spill out onto the floor. Sunlight streamed through the entrance and Richie could make out everything that had fallen out. He saw blankets and lots of little pins and clips, but what excited Richie were the paintbrushes. 

“Oh my god Eddie! How did you know I brought paint?”

“Maybe because you told me last night? Also, I think we should go with a different color on each wall.” Eddie pointed around. “Like blue on that one and green on the wall with shelves. I think it would be cool if it looked colourful.”

Richie smiled down at him, admiring his enthusiasm. Tousling Eddies hair he said; “Anything for you my little Eddie Confetti,” and they got to work.

Time went by fast as they prepped the walls for painting by pulling off posters and polaroids. ‘Don’t You Want Me’ blasted from Richie’s radio and every so often he would pull Eddie into a little twirl. Eddie would usually just shove him off and return to his work flustered as fuck, but there were other times when his hands would linger on Richie for a little too long. A little too long to be considered an accident.

After coating one wall in a bright purple, Richie flopped into the hammock and pulled out his pack of cigarettes, lighting one and bringing it to his chapped lips. He sighed in delight.

“You shouldn’t smoke in here Rich. It’s hazardous. Also, you could die. Did you know that?” Eddie coughed and that caught Richie’s attention. “At least go outside if you want to kill yourself with those things so I don’t have to smell it.”

“Gee Eds, I didn’t know you cared about me so much.” Richie muttered sarcastically and Eddie rolled his eyes. 

“Of course I care about you. You’re my best friend, whether I like that or not.” Eddie walked over to where he was slouched in the hammock and climbed in, tangling their legs. Cigarette still burning between his fingers, Richie rested his hand on Eddie’s knee and Eddie fiddled with Richie’s shoelaces. None of them pulled away. 

“Wow Spaghetti, you make me feel so special,” Eddie laughed and tapped his fingers against Richie’s shin, almost to the beat of a song but the music wasn’t playing anymore. Richie felt his face go red. He brought the cigarette back to his lips.

“Richieee” Eddie huffed, reaching out to grab the cigarette. The action made the hammock tip and they both tumbled out, Richie sprawled on top of Eddie in the dirt. Instead of getting off, he took the opportunity to nuzzle into Eddie. 

“Cuddle time, Eddie bear,” Richie murmured sweetly. 

“Ugh, get off. What if someone saw us like this,” Richie’s face fell and he pulled himself off of the smaller boy, leaning up against a wooden post. “Besides, the floor is literally dirt.” Eddie huffed. They were both quiet for a moment.

“What if.” Richie said, more to himself then Eddie.

“Huh?”

“What if someone saw us like this, Eddie. What would they say?” Eddie opened his mouth, then closed it again. His eyebrows were scrunched together again.

“You know why. Boys can’t be together like that,” he spoke finally. “Besides, you’re not, y’know, gay, and neither am I.” 

“What if I was.”

“What?” 

“What if I was gay, Eddie. What if I was a big fucking fairy. Would you still be here right now?” Eddie’s eyes widened. 

“Of-of course I would, Richie. Nothing could ever make me wanna stay away from you,” Eddie said calmly but his eyes couldn’t meet Richie’s. Richie turned and sat down on the swing, face softening. 

“Oh. Well, um, I think I am, y’know, like that. Maybe not fully but I-I definitely like boys.” Richie’s voice was quiet, a whisper.

“Cool, that’s uh, cool. Have you told anyone else?” Eddie was sitting on his knees now, drawing something in the dirt absentmindedly but his doe-like eyes were now locked on Richie’s.

The paint on the wooden walls of the clubhouse had dried. Richie reached out and ran his fingers over them, sighing. “No. I haven’t even accepted it myself. You’re the first person I’ve told. Besides, I could never tell my parents, they would kick me out or make me feel like it’s my fault or something.” His tone changed and he tried to smile widely. “Does that make you feel special Eds? Knowing that you’re my most trusted friend? It’s an honour you, know. Not even—“ 

“It’s okay Richie. You don’t have to tell anyone until you’re ready. But i’m proud of you for telling me.” Eddie smiled weakly and motioned for Richie to get up. His arms were outstretched and inviting. “Come here.” 

Richie got up and immediately wrapped his arms around the smaller boys’ torso. He felt Eddie nestle his head against his chest and sighed lightly. Eddie smelled like strawberries.

“Thanks Eds. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

Eddie pulled away from him and giggled. “You’d probably be dead. Actually, you definitely would be.” 

Richie grabbed at his heart dramatically. “Oh how you wound me Eds. Life would be sooo boring without me,” he moaned out. “Who else would call you Eds? Certainly not Bill. And those cute little rose buds on your cheeks! Just calling out to be pinched, having to live a life untouched. Does that sound nice to you Spaghetti? Sounds an awful lot like hell to me, don’tcha think?”

“Beep beep Richie,” Eddie grinned, face red under Richie’s words. The taller boy reached out to pinch his cheek and Eddie swatted his hand away. “Fuck off.” 

“You love it.”  
—

2  
august of 91’

“Fucking hell Ben. You couldn’t have insulated this place?” 

“It’s August Richie. You’re the only one who’s cold.” 

Richie groaned loudly. It was late, maybe midnight. They were all supposedly at Bill’s house, but his parents were out of town so they saw no point in staying there. Instead they were all cuddled in the clubhouse. Ben had placed multiple tarps down on the dirt floor then covered it in blankets and pillows. It was the only way they could get Eddie to sit down. 

Stan and Bill were in the corner at the drawing table, sketching out furniture to decorate the room. Mike wanted to make a couch and Richie wanted to make a bed for; “Nights with Mrs. K,” so Beverly suggested making a futon. They all agreed on it and decided to begin production in the next week. Mike had dibs on the hammock and Bev was on the swing, feet propped on Ben’s shoulders who was criss-crossed on the floor. Richie was sat across from him and Eddie was against the wall.

“Ugh fine let me freeze,” Richie whined. He shifted until his back was also against the wall of the clubhouse, shoulder to shoulder with Eddie. “You’ll keep me warm, won’t you Eds.” 

“Fuck off Richie. I need elbow room.” Eddie muttered, not bothering to look up from his notebook. 

“I don’t understand why you’re doing work in the first place Eddie. We still have another month of summer before school.” Bev said.

“If I finish my summer experience project now I won’t have to do it the day before school like Richie.” 

“Actually I’m s-st-starting to thuh-think the Ri-Richie method is the w-way to go,” Bill said. Richie found that his stutter was starting to fade. “I mean, he ah-always gets b-better grades then us.” 

Richie smirked. “It’s not my fault I’m naturally brilliant.”

“More like naturally arrogant,” Stan replied. Richie groaned and laid his head on Eddie’s shoulder. 

“It’s sleepy time,” he said softly. Eddie didn’t force him off, instead he put his notebook down and leaned the side of his head into the mess of curls. Richie felt his heart flutter. 

“Maybe we should go back to Bill’s, Rich. If you’re really this tired.” 

“It is getting late,” Ben agreed.

Richie huffed, but his eyes were closed. “You guys are such party poopers.” 

Stan rolled his eyes as he got up, grabbing his and Bill’s drawings. “Come on Trashmouth. You’re not sleeping here tonight.” 

They started filing out one by one but Richie didn’t move, keeping Eddie in place. 

“I’m comfy Spaghetti. Don’t wanna move.” Eddie didn’t protest, which shocked Richie yet again. 

“We’re leaving without you!” Bev called down and Richie heard their footsteps fade.

It seemed as though both boys were waiting for the other to say something. There wasn’t any tension, though, just peace. The presence of each other being all they needed. After a moment, Eddie broke the silence.

“You smell like cigarettes, Richie. I thought you told me you were going to stop smoking.” There wasn’t any worry in Eddie’s voice though, it was almost like he knew his words were pointless. Richie ignored his question.

“Why are you smelling me, Eddie Bear?” He retorted, though his heart soared at the thought of it. 

“Shut up Richie. It’s cause your head is on my fucking shoulder right now. If I turned we would literally be kissing.” 

“Aw, you wanna kiss me. Little Spaghetti Head, finally ready for his first kiss,” Richie lifted his head and puckered his lips. 

Eddie snorted, and pushed Richie’s head off of him. “You’re so weird. Besides, you are not gonna be my first kiss.”

Richie tried not to take that to heart. “And why not? I’m obviously the best looking loser you know.” 

“You wish. Besides, we could never.”

They were both quiet for a beat. Richie could hear crickets outside and a distant howling, probably the wind.

“Oh.” Richie said quietly, almost a whisper. His shoulder wasn’t pressed up to Eddie’s anymore. “I see.” 

“Richie, it’s not your fault. Fuck, I would love for you to be my first kiss.” 

“Woah, wait. Woah woah woah wait wait wait. What?” Richie felt his heart rate pick up. “Since when Eddie? I thought, I thought you didn’t like, y’know, boys.”

Eddie looked at him, body facing him now. His eyes were wide and glistening, almost like he was about to cry. “I’m still figuring my shit out, but sometimes I wonder if I like, uh, guys.”

Richie tried to remain calm but he felt his mind flood with possibilities. The thought of Eddie liking guys kept running through his head and he clenched his fists to prevent himself from screaming. He wanted to be sure though, before he got his hopes up. He had to be sure. An idea came to mind. 

“Do you want to maybe, test this, uh, theory?” He started. Eddie just raised an eyebrow, his hands interlaced and bouncing on his lap. Richie also noticed that his feet were tapping on the blanketed wood. 

“What are you suggesting, Tozier.” Eddie asked, though he didn’t sound too unsure.

“I mean, well, only if you want to, we could maybe, I don’t know, kiss? Just to see if you like boys! It won’t mean anything, besides, we don’t even have to tell anyone.” Richie stuttered, trying to read Eddie’s reaction. He looked frightened and Richie felt his heart break. “Sorry, Eddie. Forget I said anything.”

“No! That doesn’t sound too scary, actually. Richie Tozier, my first kiss.” Eddie looked down and Richie brought his hands to the smaller boy’s cheeks, bringing his head back up. Their eyes met and Richie smiled sweetly. He could tell Eddie was nervous and honestly, he was too. 

“Okay, Eddie Kaspbrak. I’m going to kiss you now, if that’s okay.” He moved one hand to the back of Eddie’s neck, watching the smaller boy’s eyes to see any kind of fear. 

He wasn’t sure who moved in first but all he knew now was that he could smell Eddie’s strawberry shampoo, could feel Eddie’s breath hot on his face. The asthmatic boy’s hands gripped the front of his shirt and his lips were soft on Richie’s chapped ones. Richie’s insides bloomed with butterflies and his head felt light, like he was flying. He didn’t feel fireworks, instead his stomach burned, like hot embers signalling the start of a bigger flame. 

Their mouths moved in unison while Richie drew circles on the Bambi-eyed boy’s cheek with his thumb, causing Eddie to sigh into the kiss. Richie ran his tongue along Eddie’s bottom lip, attempting to take their moment a step further but he knew he fucked up when Eddie pulled back.

“I’m, sorry. I-I wasn’t trying to scare you. I’m sorry—Eddie, I, uh, I’ll just-go” Richie hopped up, grabbing his hoodie from where it laid on the table and moved towards the ladder. He felt a hand grasp his arm but he tried not to look at the body attached to it. 

“Richie wait,” Eddie sounded desperate. “Look at me Richie. Stop!” 

Richie spun around and snapped. “Why, Eddie. What’s the point! You don’t like boys, you don’t like kissing boys and you certainly didn’t like kissing me so what’s the fucking point!”

Eddie stumbled back and sat in the swing eyes wide and glossy, hands clenched in fists. Richie wasn’t sure if he was going to breakdown into sobs or kill Richie right then and there. He didn’t want to risk it either way. 

“Eddie..look. I didn’t mean to—“

“You were supposed to understand! I thought you would understand! I’m still figuring things out Richie and I’m sorry I’m not ready to, y’know, ‘kiss with tongue’ but it’s not my fault! I just didn’t know who I could talk to about this and then I thought of you and how brave you were and I just..I don’t know,” his voice caught and he inhaled sharply, tears trickling down both cheeks. Richie crossed the blanketed floor of the clubhouse and closed the gap between their bodies, pulling Eddie out of the swing and into his arms. Eddies cries were breathy and soft and Richie felt tears soaking through the soft fabric of his unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt. He brought one hand to Eddies waves and played with them comfortingly. 

“Shhh, Spaghetti. It’ll be okay,” he murmured soothingly, receiving a quiet hiccup in reply. 

No other words were spoken that night and when they finally returned to Bill’s house they both dreamt of soft lipped kisses and tear stained cheeks, the sugar and salt of a love they’d just dipped their feet into.

—

3  
march of ‘92

“Wow you’re old.”

“Shut up Stanley. You’re just upset that Richie’s older then you,” Eddie snapped back at the golden haired boy. “Besides, you only turn 16 once.”

“Look at little Eds here sticking up for me. So cute,” Richie grinned, throwing an arm over Eddies shoulders. He patted Eddies head ignoring his protests and turned towards the rest of losers. “Thank you guys for making this birthday not suck. Now if you can kindly get the fuck out I have to clean this place before my folks get home.”

Bev, Bill and Mike left first, then Ben. Eddie had dissapeared into the den having insisted on helping clean up. Eddie was sleeping over anyway but none of the other losers had to know. Stan waited on the doorstep after Richie had made it clear that goodie bags were necessary. 

“I have to leave Trashmouth! So please hurry up and get my shit.” Stan called into the house. Richie stumbled down the stairs and onto the landing, tossing the hand wrapped rectangle over to Stanley. 

“Here. I made it myself, so please enjoy. I’m sure you’ll love it.” He watched intently as Stan fiddled with the ribbon. He tossed the loose wrappings onto the floor and held up the object. It was a photo of the two of them. They looked around 12 years old, still innocent and pure, and they both sported toothy grins. The picture was outlined in bird stickers, chickadees and blue jays and robins. 

“Remember that day? That was the day you showed me the difference between ravens and crows. I was so fucking bored Stan the Man, but I still had the time of my life. You kinda have that effect on me,” Richie smiled. “I think Spaghetti took that picture.” 

“I remember Richie. Thank you for this.” Stanley wrapped his arms around Richies torso and pulled away before the curly haired boy could even react. “Happy birthday Dick. See ya tomorrow.” 

“Bye Birdboy.” Richie waved and headed back into the the house. Eddie was by the doorway slipping his shoes on. “Where do you think you’re going.” 

“I told my mom I would be home by 11. It’s already 10:40 so I should probably leave.” He pushed past Richie and out of the house. 

“Eddie wait,” he closed the front door and ran to catch up with the smaller boy. “Why the rush Eds? I thought you were staying the night. Are you mad at me?”

“Don’t call me Eds.” 

“Come on Kaspbrak. What’s got your panties all in a twist?”

“Nothing Richie, I’m fine. Go inside,” Eddie sounded frustrated. He grabbed his bike from where it sat on the lawn and pushed it onto the road. “Happy birthday.”

Richie sighed then proceeded to pressure his friend. “Eddie please tell me what’s up. Did your mom call? I can work my charm and—“

“Do you like Stanley?”

Richie was caught off guard. “No, of course not. What the fuck makes you think that?”

Eddie got on his bike but Richie was standing in his way, preventing him from leaving. 

“I heard you guys talking. I mean, you never talk to me that way. It all sounded so honest, like-like you were more then just friends.” 

“Eddie, when do I not talk to you that way?” he said quietly. He didn’t get a reply, instead Eddie pulled himself off his bike and reached up, wrapping his hands around Richie’s neck and smashing their lips together. Richie felt his breath catch and before he knew it Eddie was pulling away. He looked worried, his eyes searching Richie’s face for some sort of reaction.

“Sorry Rich—I don’t know why I did that,” but Richie was grabbing Eddie’s waist, pulling them together and interlocking their lips once again. For a moment everything stopped as they kissed in the middle of the road in a town where even mentioning ‘Elton John’ was frowned upon. It was just the two of them, two confused boys who didn’t even know what love was. Richie was first to pull back. 

“Do you want to go inside? I don’t think getting hit by a car would be a nice way to end this day,” Eddie snorted and Richie smiled, hands still wrapped around the smaller boy’s waist. 

“Or we could go somewhere else.”

Richie raised an eyebrow and smirked. “Where are you suggesting, Eds?”

“Just follow me.”

“Yay, I love surprises,” Richie started. He really did, especially since they were something uncommon in his life. “Are we going back to your place? I really do want to see Mrs. K. Y’know, she promised me a birthday surprise too if ya know what I mean.”

“What the fuck Richie. Maybe I should just go home,” he turned and started walking the opposite way down the road. 

“Noooo Spaghetti, don’t leave me. You know you’re my favourite Kaspbrak,” Eddie kept walking though and Richie started to panic. He rushed back and grabbed Eddie’s hand, spinning him around. “I’m sorry. I take it all back. Please continue guiding me, Mr Eddie Confetti.” 

“Fine,” Eddie huffed. “Only because I know you wouldn’t let me leave anyway.”

They walked through the streets of Derry until they reached the familiar border of the barrens, hands still clasped together. Nobody said anything about it, and neither one of them wanted to let go. 

“You brought me here to kill me, didn’t you.” 

“No, dipshit,” Eddie smiled. “You must know where we’re going by now.” 

Richie smiled back because he did know. They were going to the only decent place in this shithole. 

“The Clubhouse. You got rid of the spiders for me?”

“Yes and no. Better.”

They trekked through the thicket until they reached the clearing. The sky was dark and the moon was out, casting shadows through the trees. 

“I was right. You are here to kill me.” 

“Shut up Richie,” he bent down and grabbed the hidden latch to open the door. Richie would be lying to himself if he said he didn’t check out Eddie’s ass. The trapdoor swung open and Eddie went in first.

“Give me a minute. I’ll tell you when you can come in.” He disappeared into the hole in the ground and Richie waited impatiently. He heard some rustling sounds and then Eddie’s head popped back up. 

“All set?”

“All set,” Eddie grinned. 

Richie carefully climbed down the ladder. Eddie insisted on him closing his eyes as he entered.

“Eddie I’m gonna fall.” He complained but made it to the floor of the clubhouse safely.

“Okay. You can look now,” Eddie said excitedly. 

Richie opened his eyes slowly and was immediately blinded by light. Eddie had hung christmas lights all around the room, the colours varying from soft blues to hot pinks. The floor was still covered in blankets as it had been for the past year, but Richie could tell Eddie had washed them. In the corner of the room a large box wrapped in green ribbons sat on the table. Richie didn’t focus on it for too long though, instead he turned to Eddie. 

“You remembered.” Richie thought back to the first time they’d gone down there together and how he’d mentioned doing this exact thing to the clubhouse. They’d never gotten the time to do it. 

“Of course I did. You basically branded the idea into my head.” Eddie smiled. “D’you like it?” 

“I fucking love it. Thank you. I can’t believe you were going to go home without letting me see this,” Richie said but he didn’t try to sound mad. 

Eddie huffed. “You were flirting with another boy!”

Richie groaned. “I was not and you know that. Also, you look cute when you’re jealous.”

Eddie’s face went as red as apples and Richie laughed, pinching the shorter boy’s cheek. 

“Cute cute cute Eds.” He bent down and placed a hand on Eddie’s neck, thumb kneading his jaw. “Is it okay if I kiss you?”

Eddie nodded and their lips met softly. The kiss was slow and Richie felt his heart rate pick up when Eddie opened his mouth. Richie sighed and pulled Eddie’s body flush against his as their tongues fought for dominance. The smaller boy let out a whimper that went right to a part of Richie that he hadn’t thought about all day. He pulled back for air. 

“Wow. Best. Birthday. Ever.” he breathed. Eddie looked up at him, lips red and eyes wide.

“Because of me?”

“Yeah. Cause of you.”

**Author's Note:**

> i hope y’all are liking this so far. if so come talk to me on instagram @xxtozier   
> thanks for reading!


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